I was in the sixth grade when my mother allowed me to get a relaxer applied to my hair for the first time. I must have begged and pleaded until she could not stand hearing me anymore, and finally gave in to my demands. Rather than taking me to a professional hairdresser to have it done, she let one of her friends do it. By the way, I am of Creole descent on my father's side of the family, and my mother is Native American and African American. My mother's friend was white, and had no experience working with my hair type, which is thick and curly. The relaxer dried my hair out, and contributed to major breakage at the ends. From that point on, I had my hair professionally relaxed by someone who knew how to work with my hair.
I wore relaxers up until I became pregnant with my now seven-year-old son. My hair was so damaged not just from relaxing, but also from over processing in general. Throughout the nineties, my hair went through many incarnations. I have been blond, brunette, straight, curled, slicked back, teased and cinnamon red. I have had weave down my back, and been short and cropped. Shaved on one side and blue black, so it was nice to take a break from all of the harsh chemicals I was using to achieve the look of the week. People have told me how “good” my hair is. My question to them is what exactly is “good” hair? Do you mean “good” as in better, and if so, better than what?
Madame C.J. Walker was a female entrepreneur, who made her fortune fulfilling the black woman's desire to have long, straight hair like their white counterparts. Black women of that time wanted to erase any sign of their true heritage. Systematically ridiculed for being different from whites, they tried to deny who they were, but seeing as how it would be hard to lighten their skin color, or straighten their noses, they concentrated on having hair that was nothing like the beautiful hair they were born with. When criticized for capitalizing from the black women's misguided self-hatred, she simply stated that she was helping black women take proper care of their hair. Although I detest how she built up her business, I have to give credit to her for the great things she accomplished. She not only had a mind for business, but she fought to have lynching declared a federal crime among other things.
Today black women are still trying to cover up their insecurity as it pertains to their hair, and are still blaming it on manageability, although I am seeing more women wearing “natural” hairstyles, and that is a start. I am very proud of my hair in its natural state because it tells the story of my heritage, who I am, and where I come from. I think that what we were born with is more beautiful than anything that comes in a plastic container. What sets us apart from others is what makes us beautiful.
