When I found out I was pregnant, I went out and bought all the parenting books I could find. I needed to know how to be a mom pronto. I read as much as my brain could process on just about every topic that was baby related. By the time I reached the end of my last trimester, I was ready. No matter what this kid threw at me, I would know how to handle it, or at least that is what I thought. Well, it turns out that there were parts of motherhood that none of the books covered and I thought that I would share them.
Firstly, being a mom means you have no privacy. Whatever quiet time that you were once able to enjoy, goes out the window. This is not an immediate consequence of becoming a mother; it is something that happens gradually over time. It usually starts with taking a shower with the bathroom door slightly ajar so you can hear if the baby wakes up from their nap and it slowly progresses to using the bathroom with a toddler on your lap.
Another aspect of motherhood that no one enlightened me about was: the constant exposure to bodily fluids. It seems as though babies are always expelling some sort of bodily fluid. The books described this with cute terms like ‘spit up’ or ‘drool’. But in reality it is more like rancid milk that is hurtled towards your head at the speed of light. Your washing machine is constantly running because as a mom you are constantly changing clothes, sheets and washing sopping towels. Your gag reflex is tested in its entirety.
And the last component of mommy-hood that no one told me about was: that a body does not need eight hours sleep to function. In fact a body is able to function with as little as three hours of consecutive sleep. There are times when you have no choice but to function on little to no sleep. Coffee becomes your best friend and your clothes stop matching but you are able to function.
These are some of the lessons that I learned in my first year of motherhood. As my child grows I am discovering that there are many aspects of motherhood that books did not go into detail about. And I like that. Being over prepared is not always a good thing. I am learning about my child on my own and rolling with all the punches that are thrown my way.
