This guide will help you to decipher whether your guy is a keeper or not. If he displays any of these signs, it's time to do some major thinking about your relationship.
- He controls you. Anyone that tells you what to wear, where to go, who to talk to etc. is not a healthy person. They don't like you for you. They want to change you into what they want you to be. You have to watch out for this one, it sneaks up on you; but if you find yourself constantly apologizing for being yourself, or you're constantly being yelled at, get out and fast.
- He's cheated on you. Once a cheater-always a cheater. Let me repeat this again, once a cheater-always a cheater. I've made the mistake over and over again of bringing a cheater back in my life, and the same cycle repeated itself over and over again. They may beg, they may cry, but don't let your guard down like he did when he cheated on you.
- He's a crier. It's fine and dandy for a guy to cry once in a while. Everyone gets upset and emotional, but if it's every single day then there is something wrong. He is either severely depressed or just crying for your affection and/or attention. If he's more on the depressed side, talk to him about getting help and see if that makes a difference. If he's crying to get attention, inform him that you are not his Mother and run away fast.
- He makes you feel uncomfortable. Any guy that makes you feel uncomfortable about anything is dump-worthy. I'm not being completely unfair here and saying to dump him right away, but if you've expressed your concern about anything that makes you uncomfortable and it continues then he's not going to change.
- He has a substance abuse problem. Whether it be drugs, alcohol, or sniffing glue hop on a train away from this guy. He will give you a sob story about how he does these things “every once in a while,” but come on, the dude has a problem. And don't think that because you don't partake in his habits that they won't affect you, believe me they will whether you're riding in a car with him when he gets busted, or he pawns your Mother's wedding ring to support his habit.
- He's hit you-even if it was a little slap and it was only when you kept bothering him about something that he didn't want to talk about it. That little slap will turn into big slaps, punches, and eventually beatings. I am also talking from experience here, it doesn't matter how much he apologizes and cries, he's abusive and you need to leave.
- You spend all of your money on him. Who cares that he doesn't have a job? He doesn't. There is a difference in lending someone money and getting paid back and just freely giving away your money. Any man that is comfortable taking his significant other's money, no repayment, is just using that person. See what happens when you tell him that you don't have the money, then decide if you like the reaction.
- He hates your family, friends, and anyone else that knows you. Your friends and family are a reflection of who you are. Don't let anyone seclude you from or make you embarrassed of the people that you love. Your family and friends will have been and will probably be around longer than he has. Make the right choice.
- He lets his friends disrespect you. This one is a big one. If your guy lets his friends or anyone else that he knows disrespect you then he doesn't respect you. It's either that or he's just too chicken to speak up.
- You two are not moving at the same pace. He thinks of you as a “cute girl” that he goes on dates with casually, and you think of him as the guy that you're going to marry. If he's not into you like you're into him, then why waste time. On the other side of things if he's bought you a ring and you're totally not into him then the same advice goes. Dump him.
